Sunday, November 23, 2008


Jonas Eli Huling

I still can't believe I birthed him naturally! My biggest baby yet!

First few hours.

Sleeping soundly!

Not that great of a photo right after marathon birth!

Jocelyn and Jonas

Funny picture of Jaden! He has such a big smile!

Jacob preferred playing in the curtains to holding his new brother. After all,
he's still a baby too :)

Jonas and mommy!

Jacob is very expressive these days! He really does like the baby
and now he says "baby." It is a big deal for him, since he says very

Well it finally happened. 40 weeks and 5 days Jonas Eli Huling decided to come! I had been feeling some cramping that day. Well I did have the midwife strip the membranes, but really I felt very little because I was pretty ready anyway. Then I went to Shoppers that night because they told me to get in a walk and that was all I could manage to do that day! I couldn't understand why I needed donuts and oreos and chocolate bars. I found myself stopped in the aisle like a child telling myself I had to choose and put something back, but I said "oh well, I want all of it". I had a few other decent contractions in the store, but nothing that different than the norm, so as I was ready to check out I started feeling my eyes close in the store and thought I should get a good nights rest and go to bed. I was tossing and turning a little bit that night, but then when I awoke at 4:30 out of a dead sleep. I wandered if anything was happening (I think I just dismissed it because I had been feeling things for weeks that didn't lead me to the hospital). I dozed back off and another 10 minutes later I was startled by another contraction. I guess I should have thought that it was real by then because I was starting to naturally move to my hands and knees to cope with the contraction. I headed to the bathroom insisting to Ryan that I had to go before we left. He kept standing at the door saying "I think it's the baby". I kept saying "no, I really have to go to the bathroom before we leave." ha ha. Soon after that I yelled out to Ryan to call his mom. I called my neighbor who was going to be my unoffical doula (she was going to come to the hospital, but couldn't that morning due to a work meeting), but she said she was coming right over so I could go to the hospital right away. the contractions wer now 1-2 minutes apart and we were heading to the hospital (30 minutes away by 6 am) The car ride there felt like death. It was so cold and so hard to sit straight up with the contractions. By the time we got there I could barely walk to the front doors. When we got inside Ryan got me a wheelchair and I leaned over the security counter while I waited. The guard seemed unphased (he must see this often). I joked with him and said "I guess you know where we're headed" (suprising that I still had a sense of humor) Once we got to our floor I had a small calm before the storm. I was so anxious to get into my bath, hoping there would be some small escape from the pain. Once I got to the room my midwife came and checked me. She said I was 8-9 cm and my bag of waters was bulging out. She said she didn't think I had time to get into the bath. She offered to break my water, but I was scared of facing any worse pain than I was already in. After 10 more minutes of suffering I decided to let her, because I couldn't hold onto the pain and pressure the bulging water was causing. After she broke the water, everything of course only got worse. I spent most of my time draped over the back of the bed on my knees and then on my hands and knees until right before pushing. Through all of this the sun was rising and that was spiritual and symbolic as well! As I noticed the sun and I felt halfway somewhere else. I could feel the Godliness of the experience within the surreal pain. I could feel my mother's presense and that she was letting go of another part of me that she'd held close it Heaven. I shed a tears and was suddenly very grateful for her sake that Jonas was late. I know that she cherishes every minute with my children before they come here. At least that's what I believe.

The pushing was just as painful, but just a different pain. Well, no it was worse actually! It was a total of 11 minutes! I felt really like I just couldn't do it and I was screaming "just get him out now". Once I had his head out The midwife and Ryan told me to look down at him as a sign that I was almost done, but I told them that I couldn't because I knew that I still had more work to do and I just wanted to get it done! Soon Jonas was out, but I was still gatering myself as he laid on my chest and we waited for the cord to finish pulsing. After about 10 minutes I was able to be a little more coherent and really look at Jonas' beautiful face and feel the fullness of what I had just done. Wow! I did it and now I really could feel that because I did this I could do anything! I knew my mental strength and the strength of my body. Because even though it was an inevitable thing I could feel everything within in determined to do what I had chosen from the beginning of this pregnancy I could feel everything from within (all of my will) going to this child. To bring him into this world. It was truly a Godly experience! I could feel nothing but utter happiness and a great sense of accomplishment and of course a complete love for this baby that I felt I just made a sacrifice for.
My recovery has been great. I have just emotionally been on cloud 9 since Jonas was born and I am up and around mostly around the house. I don't get out much yet, but that's ok. It is so cold here and I want to protect Jonas from the germs of the season. Don't worry I'm not thinking of exercising for at least another few weeks. I've learned that the inevitable really is inevitalbe, so why not enjoy it before it comes and you have to do it anyway (not that I don't enjoy exercising, I love it!) but I want to enjoy this new experience without too much pulling at my time.
I hope all of you have a very Merry Christmas and know that I really love all of you and think of you often! I can't wait to catch up on your blogs!!
Thank you for visiting!

Monday, November 17, 2008

40 weeks and 3 days

I know I haven't been on here in a while! I will catch you up on all of the details later, but I've been basically laboring since 34 weeks and I'm quite tired of it! Anyway, the plan was to endure and let baby come whenever he wants since I've been induced with all other babies. I really wanted to see what my body would do, but I have to say I'm getting pretty tired of being 3-4 cm and feeling pain and contractions that turn into nothing. I honestly don't know if I can endure another week of this! Let's see what the doctor says tomorrow and I will keep you posted. Again, I am so sorry I've been consumed with the last part of this pregnancy and I will update asap, hopefully with new baby pictures!
I am thinking of all of you still and hope you are well! I will comment on your blogs soon!

40 weeks and 1 day.......

Jocelyn is her Grandma's "mini me!"

She looks more like her than me!